A Look Behind the Scenes

Most everyone involved in my life since August knows I have been through quite a lot.  I have moved a couple of times, had some nightmarish experiences with my roommates, and just can't manage to find where I am today.
Through the end of August and much of September, I was avoiding home like the plague.  My exercise time shot through the roof because I was walking at the local park to waste time.  Every single meal I ate was prepared by someone other than me and more often than not was fast food.  My fabulous counting water bottle was damaged and wouldn't close anymore so my water consumption drastically dropped because I wasn't able to push myself to hit 3 or 4 refills a day.  Through all of this, I still managed to lose over 10 lbs by October 1, pushing me over 25 lbs total.  I contribute every ounce of this loss to the stress that I went through with my roommate.  I was not doing a single thing correct in the weight loss game, except exercising.
I moved into a new place, but am still dealing with roommate drama.  We are in the first baby steps of setting up house and so we are missing a lot of necessary kitchen products.  Still having issues preparing my food and having a healthy breakfast and lunch.  Dinner is getting marginally better, but still not where it needs to be.
I have gained several pounds back in the last few weeks, which I expected and wanted after everything I went through in September, but my head still seems to be not in the game.  While I am still logging, I am not as diligent as I once was.  I have increased my fitness routine and am doing fabulous, loving it, relaxing my soul as much as I can, but food just is beating me right now.  I am making changes, but sometimes I have troubles remembering why I need to keep moving forward.  
The positive changes that I celebrated and loved for 4 months were clouded over, muddied up, and just generally lost over the last 8 weeks.
Every day I am living my life, watching myself make choices that I would have not even thought about 2 months ago and now, it is so easy to go buy that Mountain Dew, or that pizza, or make the choice to not prepare my lunch for work.  
I continue to live, making a few good choices, not allowing myself to back slide completely, but looking for that determination that I embraced, looking for that motivation to make that next positive step, looking for that inner peace needed so much so I can get my head in the game and keep going.  
I am on a weight loss journey.  There will be hills and valleys and sometimes I will take a left turn and end up in the thicket.  I know this is where I am now.  I know that if I keep walking, taking that next step, I will get to somewhere I know.  Yes, I might step into a hole and fall, but I will pick myself back up, bandage up the wounds, and take my next step.  When I cross the finish line to a healthier me, I will know that I am stronger and better for having taken this journey.
Thank you to everyone who holds my hand, picks me up when I fall, and offers a bandaid when I need it.  Each of you helps me to move forward each day!