A New Year

I started writing this with the intention of posting it on New Years day...  Unfortunately, my Wii Balance Board decided that it did not want to cooperate with me.  I decided not to change the theme of this post because although it is January 5, I know some people have already forgotten their resolutions from last week.  Or already messed up and are saying, 'Oh well, there is always next year, or tomorrow, or next week, or...'  We are a society that likes to put off until tomorrow stuff that we should have done yesterday.  I am a member of this same society.  If I wasn't then the life I am living today would be much different, but I am, and here, and so are you, so let us continue with this belated blog about the new year.

I am not a New Years Resolution person.  I don't think that there is any difference between tomorrow, yesterday, or today, except how you see it, how you react to it.  The fact that I weighed in today for the first time in 4 months, is purely a coincidence.
It has much more to do with the fact that for the first time in years I have hope for the future, and my potential role in it will be made much easier if I can lose more of this fat that just keeps hanging around.
Up until recently, this journey has been mostly easy.  I started walking, bought a Wii, lost 30 lbs. Joined a gym, lost another 4% body fat. I might not have been right on target, but I was doing pretty fabulous.
Then I decided to get a "real" job...  I now leave my house at 6:30 in the morning and get home at 6:15 in the evening. While I don't work "in the hood", my office is close enough that it was recommended to me to not walk at my lunch hour. Actually, don't even get out of your car! By the time I get home and find something to eat, or if I am really ambitious, make something actually healthy, I am exhausted and ready for bed. Where am I supposed to fit fitness?
I know...  Make the time! It is all so much easier said than done...
I've tried getting up at 5:00 to go to the gym...  And I can do it, if I am REALLY committed, but then I feel rushed...  Literally 20 - 30 mins to work out after being used to spending hours at the gym...  It just doesn't make me feel good like it should...  Not enough endorphins released, or something...  I'd much rather just throw on my sneakers and head out the door for a long exhausting run that do a bunch of running around...  But it is dark, and the road I live on is...  well not the safest road to be running on after dark.  Not talking about the danger of walking at work dangers, but more like falling into a hole, severely injuring myself, or some other such nonsense and since I am still fighting to recover from my overly ambitious and cocky attitude from those damn tires 8 months ago...  Further injury just does not sound like my idea of a good time...

But I did finally figure out a way to wake up, put on my sneakers, and burn some calories.  Just yesterday, I finished setting up my Wii in the main house living room.  It is after all where it was set up before I moved into the city.  I did try to workout in my apartment on the Wii, I really did, but even after rearranging my bedroom to get more workout room, the best I could manage was about 4' x 6'.  Sure I can do push ups, sit ups, etc, but Zumba?  Let me tell you it ain't pretty....  So we are set up in the house...  I will have to keep it quiet as to not wake everyone up, but I lost the first 15 lbs just like this!  I know it works!  I know I can do it.  And this time around I have a lot more than just Wii Fit to get me going.  I am going to have variety in my workout!!!  EA Active, My Fitness Coach, Jillian Michaels, Zumba, Wii Fit Plus, and if I just want to have some fun then there is even Wii Sports & Wii Sports Resort.

I have been wishing for some time that my gym did classes, but I guess that is part of the price of a more expensive and bigger gym.  I still love my small and intimate gym, just wish I could get there more often.  

In the last 2 days, as I have been setting up the Wii, I have decided that I do have classes and no I cannot miss them..  Every morning I will get up for class, every night after getting home I will do class before bed.  I can do this.  I will do this.

My friends from Lose It are rallying around me once more, and in actuality, they never left.  They were there, waiting for me to come back.  Waiting to enfold me back into the love and hope and encouragement to keep moving forward.  And my Loser friends that have moved into my 'real' life???  Are more than any person should have a right to expect.  It is absolutely amazing the love that I have received as I have moved closer to this day over the last several weeks.

So today is my re-commitment to a healthier me, because after all that is what I want to be right?  Not a Barbie doll, but to be beautiful to my groom on my wedding day, to be able to present him with a beautiful and even more healthy baby?  I know that this all can't happen overnight, but someday, I want to have it all, so today, this is what I can do, this is what I will do, this is what I must do!!!!

Weighed in this morning....  Let's just leave it at this is the highest weight ever entered into Lose It....  But it is not my highest weight ever so I can come back from it!

I will start logging my meals better

I will start exercising for 1 hour a day

I will start posting more often than once in the last six months

I will keep moving forward

A Long Recovery

I don't know how I let the entire month of June pass without a post, but here I am..  Thank you to everyone who checked in on me in the last month...  Sorry I wasn't here for you...
Once again...  Still going, still fighting and still trying to win this battle!
Remember that tire that I loved flipping so much?  I discovered it has a rather nasty side...  Or at least my sciatic nerve discovered it...  2 months later, I am still working on recovery...  Last week I did start working back towards a normal routine, but my hip is still very weak and some of my stretches still hit a painful spot.  My cardio has been reduced with strict instructions to keep my heart rate below 130, which if you remember my race, know how difficult that has been.
I am doing a traditional 4 day split with each day focused on specific areas of my body.  I am, so, not used to this at all.  My training, from the first dumbbell I picked up, has been focusing on compound movements.  Each day I have 4 exercises, 15 reps of each, 4 - 6 sets.  So far, the only day I have been able to hit 6 sets is legs and that is because that is where all my power is!!!  Yesterday was a chest day.  I was lucky to hit 10 reps, 4 sets!!!  And today...  Ouch!
That seems to be my favorite word lately...  Ouch!  From my inner thighs, glutes, entire ab area, to pecs...  Ouch!
But I am one of those strange people that refuses to give up and actually loves the pain.  Although is it really pain?  Or is it progress in your body?  Muscle being torn down and rebuilt, bigger, stronger?
I will take a full week of muscle soreness and longer over the 2 month plus recovery from the injury sustained from the tire.  Believe me when I tell you there is a difference and it is a difference each of us need to identify and learn when to quit and when to keep going.
Even when I could barely walk, I was still at the gym, still working on recovery for my hip and strengthening my upper body!  I changed my plan, but refused to quit.  And today, I am back working my hip, albeit at a much lower weight...
With muscle soreness, I can work through it, or stretch it out and still work without fear of injury.
Another battle that we each have to face is how easy it can be for us to slip back into old ways.  I had a very fun Fourth of July weekend including 2 Airbrush Gypsy shows, a girls day out, a Despicable Me 2 drive in theater party, and going to see fireworks at the lake.  A great weekend free of most any worries and stress!  But I didn't have a lot of time to do housekeeping chores, like laundry...  So when I got to the gym yesterday, I discovered I didn't have any socks in my car.  I started shooting myself because I remember pulling a pair of socks out of my gym bag that morning and putting them in the dirty clothes.  Why, oh why, did I have to pick yesterday morning to be the day to clean out my bag...  Man I am so stupid....  Oh well...  I guess I'll just go home and do laundry so I can come back tomorrow...  NO!  You are going to go to the store and buy socks for the 4th time this year and come back to the gym for your workout!!!!!
It is so easy to come up with an excuse not to walk through the door...  AND I was parked in front of the gym!!!  Less than 100' from the door and I was ready to just go home...
Remember, no matter the battle, that the war is key...  We can do this!  We will do this!  And together...  we can do anything we want!  Just keep going, keep fighting, and keep trying!!!